Hey Oompa: I'm totally with you on this thread. It's funny because Dawg's initial post could have been written by my brother, and your post by me. My brother runs around doing whatever he wants and I'm trapped by my guilt. Guilt over what? Who knows? I'm glad to be out but I have my days when I wonder, just a little bit, if I've made a mistake. Every day has its ups and downs. Just know that you're not alone.
NYer Girl
JoinedPosts by NYer Girl
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36
Did you think your life was over as you knew it? Were you sure?
by oompa ini knew, and i am beginning to think i was right.
several shrinks and therapists later, and i realize that my entire life structure is not only gone, but it was a farce in the first place.
how do you cope with that?
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Newbies - Tell Us Your Stories Getting out of the Witnesses
by flipper inhello newbies and others.
it is really exciting to see so many joining on board here looking for support !
perhaps some of us who have been there done that can give you some tips to make life a bit easier exiting the mind control cult, jehovah's witnesses .
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NYer Girl
I grew up in a divided household, but my dad liked that we were "in the religion" (that's how I phrase it now, since I won't call it "the truth" and I cant bring myself to say JW's) because it kept us out of trouble. My parent's divorced when I was 15 and my mother married a brother from another congregation. I rejected my real father because of the religion and I realize now how shabily I treated him, even though he tried to maintain a relationship with me.
At 18 I started secretly dating an elder's son who had been labeled "bad association" and of course, we committed "fornication". We were both publicly reproved and I was removed as a pioneer. It happened on my 19th birthday. WORST DAY OF MY LIFE. Because it was my step-brother's turn to make announcements, he had to stand in front of the congregation and make my announcement. His voice cracked as he spoke and I wanted the floor to open up under me.
My boyfriend and I married a few months later even though I knew that it wasn't meant to be. I felt that I was used goods and no decent brother would want me. My husband hardly ever went out in field service, couldn't hold down a job and missed a lot of meetings. I was very diligent, working full time, preaching every chance I got and I never missed a meeting. The final straw came when the elders sat us down and restored our privileges as a couple. I remember thinking that I had done all of the work and he benefited.
Nine months after we married, I told him I wanted a divorce. I spoke to the elders and detailed all the ways he failed to be the head of the household (abusing the dog, sleeping all day while I was at work, etc.) Their response: "We know of sisters who literally hate their husbands, but they stay married because Jehovah hates divorce." After that, I started fading. My husband finally left and I never saw him again. We divorced officially a few years later.
The last time I stepped foot in a Kingdom Hall was on October 11, 2001. I was 21 years old. I was in denial for years and finally broke down and went to therapy, which helped tremendously, although I still have trouble making friends. The loss of all of my friends in the religion still weighs heavily on me and makes me cry sometimes. I don't post here often, but I visit every day because I know that all of you understand what it was like. My current husband wonders why I can't just get over it. It's part of my life story and I can't just eliminate it. Thanks for listening.
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How old were you when baptized as a JW?
by Serg ini was 16 and not a clue in the world what i was getting into..... how about you?
how old were you?.
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NYer Girl
11. I did it because my best friend got baptized the year before (at 10 years old!) and I was afraid the elders would start asking questions if I didn't get baptized, too. I started pioneering just before senior year so that I would get into pioneer school before her (she didn't start till we graduated). So much competition. I can't believe I was sucked into it.
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Time for Jokes.....Tell Us Your Favorite JW Joke!
by new boy ini like rodney dangerfielsd's .
"so i hear a knock at the door.
i open the door and there are two jehovah's witness, they look at me and both say 'they are not interested' ....i get no respect.. and .
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NYer Girl
How many elders does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just get a Ministerial Servant to do it!
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Time for Jokes.....Tell Us Your Favorite JW Joke!
by new boy ini like rodney dangerfielsd's .
"so i hear a knock at the door.
i open the door and there are two jehovah's witness, they look at me and both say 'they are not interested' ....i get no respect.. and .
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NYer Girl
How do you start a marathon in Brooklyn Heights? (Where Bethel is located)
Roll a quarter down the street.
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Buying a co-op--Advice Please!
by NYer Girl inmy husband and i went to open houses halfheartedly last sunday, figuring that we'd never be approved for an apartment.
not three days later, we find out that they've accepted our offer!
i understand the steps that come next (real estate lawyer, contract, co-op board review, etc.
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NYer Girl
My husband and I went to open houses halfheartedly last Sunday, figuring that we'd never be approved for an apartment. Not three days later, we find out that they've accepted our offer! I understand the steps that come next (Real Estate Lawyer, contract, co-op board review, etc.) but what else? What advice can anyone give me so that I dont end up buying a lemon? We are going to see the apartment again this week. What should I be looking for?
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Are You Sure That You Don't Still Think & Act Like A Jehovah's Witness?
by minimus indo you still have jw traits left remaining within you?
be honest.
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NYer Girl
Sometimes, I'll walk outside in the morning and think, "Wow, today would be a great day for preaching!" After 6 years these thoughts still appear unbidden and I chuckle at how far I've come since then.
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Do you ever fear that they will kill you?
by NYer Girl ini've heard the jws referred to on this site mostly as a cult.
as such, am i the only one who fears that one day the society will tell them to eliminate all of us who have been deemed apostates?
i can think of several of my old "friends" who would not hesitate to take me out.
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NYer Girl
There are a lot of Watchtower mandates that are taken to the extreme by the elders and R & F of the congregations, and I always wondered if maybe they might not take it too literally if they were told to protect themselves against us. And no, it's not something that I fantasize about and I don't need medical help. I just know that when I was a teenager, I would sometimes discuss with my fellow JW teens what Armageddon would be like. Would we be asked to take part? Of course, being the good, brainwashed JWs that we were, we swore to stay loyal and carry out God's command, whatever it may be. But when "God's command" really comes from men, it can be a very dangerous thing.
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Do you ever fear that they will kill you?
by NYer Girl ini've heard the jws referred to on this site mostly as a cult.
as such, am i the only one who fears that one day the society will tell them to eliminate all of us who have been deemed apostates?
i can think of several of my old "friends" who would not hesitate to take me out.
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NYer Girl
I was a witness for 20 years, including my childhood and became a regular pioneer. The congregation that I was a part of was particularly vehement, really a cesspool of hypocrisy and judgment. All I'm saying is that my understanding of the definition of a cult is that they'll do whatever they are told. I certainly did. We see that they're no longer allowed to do outside study. They are looking to insulate themselves even furthur and we are their enemies. But what IF. Just a thought...
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Do you ever fear that they will kill you?
by NYer Girl ini've heard the jws referred to on this site mostly as a cult.
as such, am i the only one who fears that one day the society will tell them to eliminate all of us who have been deemed apostates?
i can think of several of my old "friends" who would not hesitate to take me out.
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NYer Girl
I've heard the JWs referred to on this site mostly as a cult. As such, am I the only one who fears that one day the society will tell them to eliminate all of us who have been deemed apostates? I can think of several of my old "friends" who would not hesitate to take me out. Think: Jonestown, Heaven's Gate, etc. Is it so far-fetched to think that, instead of sucide, they might commit homicide?